The train that waits for no man.

In the name of Allah.

Seems to me like this blog longs for an update.  *krikk krikk krikk*

After a wild week of me turning cuckoo with exams and deadlines, and now the start of a new freaking demanding module, I think I need to stop just for a little bit and focus on the thing that I like the most, dakwah. It's not like I'm secularising studies from dakwah or anything. It's just that after a month of hardcore revision, I don't feel that I have contributed anything. It's me at the edge of futur-ing.

Come to think of it, I can't even recall a time when I was not in futur. Please help yourself- give me a hyper-mega slap in the face! -.- With the brothers and sisters in Palestine crying and resiliently endevouring the evil clutches of Zionists, what I was doing all this while is to 'sit back, relax and watch the show'. Shame on me.

Ok, enough of me ranting. Back to business. :D

Last Friday, I was on a hurry to go to class. Upon the arrival at Finsbury Park tube station, there was an announcement made from the control room. I couldn't care less of what it was all about and had my earphones plugged in anyway.  So, I scooted to the Southbound Piccadilly Line platform.

A note - this is a direct train from Finsbury Park to my campus in South Kensington which takes about 45 minutes door-to-door per journey.

10 am is definitely a peak hour. A Piccadilly train was at the stop, with too many passengers. Not that I could not squeeze in. I just wanted to wait for the next train, for a free seat because there was not many people at the platform waiting. Yes, this is how it's like every day. It's worse if I have class at 9am because I have to be at the station by 8am. The horrible crowd. -.- You feel like a living canned sardine sometimes. So, I let the train off. Then, another announcement was made. Anticipating that it was important, I took off my earphones.

Piccadilly line train.

"There's no more trains at this platform due to Piccadilly line being partly suspended between Arnos Grove and King's Cross. If you wish to complete your journey, please proceed to the Victoria Line platform."

Saaayyy wwhhhaattt???!!

Just so you know, Finsbury Park lies between Arnos Grove and King's Cross.

Now, I fully understand the train analogy I learnt in usrah.

"Islam or His hidayah is like a train. If you wait and miss it, there's no guarantee that you'll be able to complete your journey. The next train might not just be there."

I guess that was how Zuljaushan ad-Dhabbabiy felt when he embraced Islam after Fath al-Makkah (the opening of Makkah). And this also reminded me of this verse from the Noble Quran:

"Recite unto them the tale of him to whom We gave Our revelations, but he sloughed them off, so Satan overtook him and he became of those who lead astray." Al-A'raf [7:175]

>.<

The moral of the story is don't wait. Do it now! Hidayah may come and go but sometimes they don't really come back. Kalau tak amik peluang, melepaslah. =p

Why so lazy? Do it now la~!

Once a Wilsonite : A tip or two for you future IC munchkins.

In the name of Allah.

Assalamualaikum to all!!

It's that time of year when exam is drawing near and you just got Uni offers. Yay! When the thing you should really be doing is to focus on studying, you need to apply for your accommodations. D'ohh..! And when it comes to Imperial College, you have lots to choose from. Which means, you need to do hall hunting on the website with the little time you got. No fear, I'm here to help you avoid the hassle of browsing through the website. And, yeah, I might be a little bit biased. :p

Of course, the criteria we look for are vital. In my case, these were the things I looked for in order of preferences :

1. Single!

2. Price range

3. Halal food!

4. Distance from campus

5. Personal fridge (you'll soon learn why :p)

First, there are the Eastside, Southside and the halls of Prince's Gardens:

Gabor, Linstead, Wilkinson, Tizard, Falmouth, Selkirk, Keogh, Weeks* and Gardens.

All of these are on campus. If your class is at 9am, you can actually wake up 10 minutes before and still be in time for your lectures! All of them are en-suite rooms. The down part is the price. >190 per week. Of course you can opt for twin en-suite but you really don't want to take the risk of having inconsiderate roommates. Trust me, you don't. In any case, twins would cost you about 125 per week.

There's one more on campus: Beit.

Price range is from 105 to 190 per week. Quite a few choices to choose from : single (en-suite or standard) and twin (en-suite or standard). It's the latter that is cheaper. It's next to Royal Albert Hall, Royal College of Music and Student Union. So, it tends to get crowded and noisy, not really a good place to study. Of course, you can always go to the library. =D

Then there are the halls of Evelyn Gardens:

Fisher, Holbein, Willis Jackson, Bernard Sunley and Southwell.

It's one of the safest neighbourhoods in London. About 20 mins walk (London style, Malaysian style would probably take up to 30 mins) to campus. I don't think there's any en-suite available. So, there are only standard single, twins and triple O.O available. Price range 60~120 per week. A good choice but halal food is not that frequent here. So, if you're into cooking even if when you're too tired to do so, knock yourself out.

And then there are the others which I found less interesting (most probably because I have never been to these halls before.) One of them is not in walking distance by which I mean, it takes more than 40 minutes if you want to. And the price hovers around 120~180 per week for standard and en-suite singles. Please be aware that you'll need to spend on transport too. Not really a money-wise choice. But you can check them out: Parson, Pembridge** and Orient.

And last but not least, my hall: Wilson House!=)

Only single standard rooms are available here. 7 per bathroom and 15 per kitchen. Don't worry, they don't use the bathrooms early in the morning. Only Asians do!=p Some kitchens might be more spacious than others. Room sizes are not that bad, the smallest ones are in the basement and the larger ones are on the top floors. Price range is from 100~130 per week. Back then, it was 90~120 pw. You can choose to walk, across Hyde Park - around 30 mins to campus. It's really nice to have a morning stroll everyday. :) But you might want to use the bus/tube during winter. Should take you around 20 mins. We have Imperial Sports Centre at the back of the building too. Lots of halal food and meat around, and even better 5 Malaysian restaurants! Within walking distance. Satay house is just next door, literally! Owh and we're the only Imperial hall of residence with fridge in each room!=D The best part is, there's a mosque in the vicinity! Salahuddin Trust! A total WIN! :D just a block away!

Here's a sneak peek of my room in 2009/2010:

The study desk. The irony : possibly 50% my time in London was spent here doing a lot of other things but studying.

The fridge : don't you just love it when your snacks are just within reach. ;)

Wash basin. Yeap, winter mornings made easy. =p

And the rest of the room when I first arrived here.

So, yeah. I didn't lie about my being a bit biased. :p

After all the time that you have spent to read my rambling here, I think it would be proper to actually give a guide on which halls to choose. Considering all the criteria that I have brought forth earlier, I personally think that these halls should be your top choices :)

1. Wilson House : what more can I say? :p

2. Any single in Evelyn Gardens.

3. Weeks* : The price is actually cheaper than the other halls on campus. A bit tight on budget but still tolerable.

4. Pembridge** : I would consider this as well because it bears the postcode of W2, just like Wilson. So, you will be able to gain access to the things that I have described for Wilson.

That's all about it, I guess. You will need to come up with a list of 5, I think. And try to prioritise the criteria that you want and why you want them. They will come in handy during the application.=)

Here's the Youtube channel for IC accommodations: >Click!<

Best of luck. InshAllah.

Another allegorical note - I don't want to be a virus.

In the name of Allah.

Why O' why don't I want to be a virus?

Firstly, it's not even a living creature as far as Biology concerns. It doesn't have 'the look'. What look? The look la. -.-

OK, I'm rambling, as always.

Anyhow, do you know that a mature virus particle is called a virion?

Urh, apologies for the digression. -.-" I think my quiescent alter ego is finally making its move.

Anyway....! What do you feel when you hear  the word 'virus' itself? If you ask me, I feel that it carries a heck lot of bad and ugly connotations anyone could possibly imagine. Ewwww....... and it brings all those nasty diseases, not forgetting cancer!

So, why virus all of the sudden? It just came to me recently, about a book written by Abu 'Ashim Hisham entitled "Virus-virus Ukhuwah" . I mean, all this while I did not question on his diction on the title. Well, not until recently. And then as I was revising on Virology, I begin to fully comprehend his choice of words.

I'm not going to do a whole analysis on the book though. Just going to highlight a few which I find interesting.

"And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys." Luqman [31:19]

If a virus could talk, I seriously think it would be as hideous as a donkey. The way it dictates the host cell is just like a.. well, a dictator. If cells were able to fight back, they would do another revolution just like those of  the middle East. Exaggerating, I know. But, you get what I mean. Call them viruses pushy because they are.

Viruses have a  few modus operandi . The typical one is called lytic infection - this is the MO where they infect and kill the cells mercilessly. Another alternative is called lysogeny. This is a devious and sinister MO practised by the ever-so-popular HIV and of course, others as well. They will incorporate themselves innocuously with the host cells as a potential infecting agent without actually causing any infection and stays there quietly. Doing nothing till the right trigger comes -.-. Talk about sly. I'm just afraid that I might be one of the viruses in the lysogenic cycle. Nauzubillah.

Then there's another point which is to use others for you own benefit or in Malay which is menunggangi sahabat untuk objek dakwah. That sounds way better in English. If you don't know what it means, it's better to keep it that way. Trust me. This can be closely related to virus and its actions on the host cells - incorporating its viral DNA or RNA in the host and tricking them to replicate and produce their viral proteins. Hence, this strongly supports the title chosen by Abu 'Ashim Hisham.

Why did I choose the title for this post? Because when I read the book, a lot of the things said pinpointed back at me. >.< With no knowledge of the things I have been doing are just inappropriate, I have evolved into a virion.

Hey yo! I'm a virrr..er, virion! You have a problem with that?!

But, I'm glad that they are people around me who cares to give me a wake up call. Thank you Allah.

A tempo - read this in Italian.

In the name of Allah.

When exam is drawing near, this is how you feel like:

I'm definitely behind my schedule but inshAllah everything will be OK! :D

Global-warming.

In the name of Allah.

This is how optimists think of the future:

 For the pessimists, this is how the future looks like:

When optimists start to think like pessimists, I blame global-warming.

P/s: We have fear of the unknown, and the future is definitely one of them. I pray to Allah to grant us steadfastness in this righteous path. Amiin.

The allegory of molecular cell biology - cell communication.

In the name of Allah.

There's just so much to study for the upcoming exam. But, I'm glad that it's not all about memorising ridiculous terms and abbreviations. That is, if you use the fikrah (way of thinking) of Islam.

Yes, in the lecture, Dr W relates this with the society eg, how we interact with our colleagues and all. To show you a closer outlook on this, we shall examine why cancerous cells become well.. cancerous.

Cells are pre-programmed to commit suicide or apoptosis. However, the signals that they receive; growth factors and etc prevent them from doing so. To put it simply, if you cut off these signals, they'll die. So, how does cancer arise from this? This happens when there's lack of signalling (read: interaction/communication) or even if there is, it's in efficient. It's not a disease but more to an "operational failure". Just like the popular belief, cancerous cells have uncontrolled growth and proliferation rate due to them, failing to give the correct response to the signals that they receive. They do not just stay at one place (in-situ) but goes everywhere in the body, growing within other tissues and disrupting their functions. The result is, fatal.

As I see it, dakwah requires us to work in a team. Even Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. started by recruiting Abu Bakar, Ali and others r.a.. And to work in a team requires a good communication between members and of course, the things we do are based on syura. We don't want to be the cancerous cells in a body, do we?

"Truly Allah loves those who fight in His Cause in battle array, as if they were a solid cemented structure." As-Saf [61:4]

I think the description of cancerous cells has already given us a clear picture of what's to come if we don't synchronise ourselves as a team. 

What say you?

More to come inshAllah. :)

Evaluation and filter.

In the name of Allah.

Just a short post before I retire for the night.

I know that I've posted something on 'not to be rigid' with what you read. I think I need to elaborate just a little bit more on that.

We do know that you can't simply believe and accept the things that we read or hear. Yeah, that applies here too. Just don't turn off your filter and shut down your evaluation just because the book looks good on the outside. As the cliche goes, "don't judge a book by its cover". Ask around - your naqib, friends, enemies, foes, frienemies or whatever. It takes time to build a 'good filter' as a Da'ie. But, through experience, you'll learn it sooner or later. On my part, I still have a lot to learn. So, I don't simply recommend a book until I'm done reading it.

On a different context, I'm losing my sensitivity these few days because I have been ignoring the need of evaluating other people's feelings. I didn't know that being rational can be this troublesome. -.- Or maybe I'm taking the wrong side of things.

This is definitely another tarbiyyah from Him. O' Lord, please guide me. Amiin.

Worrywart.

In the name of Allah.






Look at those kids playing. As the saying goes, "ignorance is bliss". They can play all that they want with no problems to think of.

As for me, I'm studying here while waiting for the Asar prayer. With lots to think, I'm coming down with a major headache. That's good I guess. I'm not slacking off.

Well, I'm a worrywart. And I don't complain. It's good to worry about others. So, I shouldn't stop worrying. ;)

P/s: iBlogger is no longer working. So, I changed to BlogPress =)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Prince's Garden, South Kensington

The five things.

In the name of Allah.

The five languages of affection are affirmative words, quality time, gifts, physical touch and acts of service. I just find this really helpful as a da'ie. Whether you like it or not, you're dealing with people - some may be emotional, others may be rational and there are those whore are just neither. And yeah, I learnt this when I was in Spain.

Someone asked, "Which type are you?" and I had no idea what to answer.

Another one asked the same question and I thought that I'm a little bit of each. He disagrees and said that I'm more to the quality time kind of guy. In a weird way, I think it's true. Huh, looks like I don't even know myself that well. Come to think of it, I don't think any of us know ourselves any better. That's why Allah did not create us to live alone. There are just people out there who surprisingly know us better.

I was also told about this four colour test which helps you know yourself better - trust me, you need to know your strengths and weaknesses. So, I tried on this :

http://www.truecolorscareer.com/quiz.asp

And the results are reliable. Plus, they actually gave a list of books to read on - most of them can be downloaded for free on the net. Soft skills are definitely important and what I've been doing is to read on these kind of books. Alhamdulillah, they help me a lot. I guess the best tip is not to be rigid. :)

I have a feeling that this is another answer to my prayers. ;)

F***r or what??!

In the name of Allah.

The trip to Spain was awesome. And of course there were more to it than just a vacation. An issue that I want to raise here is quite controversial - as if the title is not controversial enough. :p Anyway, some candies for your eyes :

I'm positive that each one of us is pretty amazed with the refined structures and engravings that were brought forth during those times. To actually witness them before my eyes, and knowing the fact that we lost everything are quite overwhelming - anger, frustration, anguish and distress. But, there's no one else to blame but ourselves.

So, the question is now, why did the people Andalusia went to such length with their architecture - flamboyant? Were we not taught to be moderate in our lifestyles just like Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. and his Companions? Why the theatrics and extravagance? Is this what we call futur? (I have no idea what's the exact definition of the word - let's just say that it's a bad thing to have as a da'ie)

Definitely not a statement that you hear often, but that's the truth I guess. Although, I, for one does not agree with this statement entirely. If you look closely to the master  pieces presented to us - or at least what are left of them like the Mezquita which gradually turns into a cathedral, the kalimah of Allah were engraved widely and I am pretty sure that it serves a purpose. As if those who were involved in building these great structures had foreseen that a time will come when people will have misconceptions on their works; they will only look at them superficially, mesmerised by their beauties and nothing more. Look at us, we forget that the best of creations are from Allah and only Him! Thus, the kalimah presented in their works serve a significant role - to remind us of Allah.

Then, what about futur? Frankly, architectures played an important role to signify power and glory of a civilisation and at that time Islam was what we call as Ustaziatul Alam, or not quite but something along that line. And that's just that. Nothing more, nothing less. But hey, Islam was standing in the eyes of the world. No wonder we observed the decline of Islamic civilisation later. It was because we were already at the top and people started to slack off in dakwah and do unnecessary things. I'm not saying that this is right but the tendency was there.

Now, let's have a perspective check. It's a shame because we're far from being at the top of the world but yet, we're slacking off. So, if we were to label 'futur' on a civilisation, let's put it on ourselves shall we? The fact that the ummah is no longer as strong as we had back then makes me wonder why are muslims nowadays ignoring their personal tarbiyah, the development of a muslim individual? Why are we using our scarce energy and efforts on ineffective methodology? Where's our jihad?

I leave these questions for us to ponder. :)

"There is no conquerer but Allah."

Baggage.

In the name of Allah.

Baggage for Spain.

And this is after the trip.

It's a good thing, trust me. :) Lots to do.

I'll write updates on the trip later, inshAllah.

Una breve actualización.

In the name of Allah.

Yeay! Internet access at Marina del Sol. The place is just superb. I'll definitely write more on this.


I'm having the time of my life here. Not because of the vacation, but of the things that I have learnt here. Life that revolves around dakwah. An experience that gives another wake up call. ;)

Rememeber when I said that I wanted a getaway? Getting away from problems? Nah, it's more like having a head-on collision with my problems. Allah's plan is the Grand Design after all.

Quoting a brother, "Prove to me that this Jaulah to Espana is a success."

Let's make sure that we, or I, especially can sustain this spirit for dakwah. Amiin.

Hasta luego!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Urbanización Ribera Sol,Mijas,Spain

Earthquake, volley, birthday and Espana.

In the name of Allah.

I slept at 7am this morning and woke up at 10-ish am because of a man-made Sendai-like earthquake and tsunami, thanks to F. He gets hyperactive when it comes to volleyball. So, yeah. Volley rocks! :)

I had fun. Can't remember when was the last time I had a great time like that. Worth the sleep I missed. LOL.

On another happy note. Yesterday was my beloved nenek's 81st birthday! May Allah bless her with great health and prosperity. I miss her, and her cooking. Listening to her voice just now made me want to cry. :( anyway, Happy Birthday nenek!

Off to Spain tomorrow. But, we're leaving for the airport tonight- just to make sure we don't miss the early morning flight. A bit excited really. I've been longing for a getaway with the people I care and love. Alhamdulillah, that's what Allah has blessed me with. I'll be away for a week ;)

I'm all excited! Let's hope that Allah will prosper Jaulah Spain KITA with His barakah. Amiin.


P/s: Hopefully I'll get preeettty pictures to upload here. :D

"I like squiggles."

In the name of Allah.

This is my first entry from iPhone. Why? No electricity. Probably we need to top up. *sigh* So, I decided to download iBlogger. :D

Anyway, A LOT happened yesterday - the good, the bad and the worst. Everything happens for a reason right? I believe it was to test my patience. I have to admit that emotions can cloud my judgements sometimes. Well, that's an understatement; most of the times.

I just can't believe that someone who's not involved in the things that you do could simply humiliate and launch personal attacks on you in public. I wish I could elaborate more on this but it just doesn't feel right. I remember Imam Ghazali once said:

"To control one's anger is a genuine strength."

Alhamdulillah. I managed to get a hold of myself. :)

That was the bad and the good. And the worst, I am a jerk. It reminds me of how imperfect I am in comparison with Rasulullah s.a.w.. Still a long long way to go.

"'O Allah, forgive me for I have sinned."

P/s : I'm sorry. You know who you are. :(

P/s/s : The title? Don't ask. It just feels right. :)

Kiss of Death.

In the name of Allah.

A really funny video I got from my lectures on Tumour Immunology just now.

Tumour cells are pervasive and deluding, just like jahiliyah. Now, let's see ourselves as "the nice white cells". And IgG2 as our unguided judgments. So, yeah, being misled and all, we're bound to be victims of the devious jahiliyah and its deceits.

Unfortunately for jahiliyah, al-haq will always prevail. IgG1 as His Guidance, the Holy Quran and the Prophet's s.a.w. sunnah give us a wake up call. So, we can now give a goodbye kiss to jahiliyah! :)

Funny and enlightening right? ;)

Because I care.

In the name of Allah.

A red-letter day. Both literally and figuratively. Period.

A symphony that makes no sense.

In the name of Allah.

I'm staying up late because I just completed my LAST coursework of the term! (yay, finally!) Instead of going to bed early, I decided to do some reading on Music and Western Civilisation. This is a "compulsory optional" subject mandatory to all 2nd years at Imperial. Why music? Don't ask. Possibly the worst decision I have ever made in my entire life. *sigh* Ah well, exam is next Friday. There's no turning back. ;)

If you have been reading my blog, you'll notice that the title does not really depict the content most of the times. Not entirely that is. Pretty much like the Noble Quran innit? :)

Well, this week has been a series of trials, one after another. Alhamdulillah, He never fails to answer to my prayers. Just when I'm trying to blame anything/anyone other than myself, Allah reminded me via this verse:

"Why [is it that] when a [single] disaster struck you [on the day of Uhud], although you had struck [the enemy in the battle of Badr] with one twice as great, you said, "From where is this?" Say, "It is from yourselves." Indeed, Allah is over all things competent." Ali Imran [3:165]

The verse just made a bull's eye out my heart ;)

All praise is to Him for He never abandons me in times of need. Never ever forget that He is always there for all of us.

Sandwiched blog with tutorial, lab write-up and music revision.

In the name of Allah.

Yes! Another update. Not at the most conducive time though. Hence, the title. I need a break. I want some sandwich.

Yummy!

I have been wanting to write some biochemistry related stuff. If I were to list them up, it's never-ending! But, there's just soooo little time to write. I have to keep my priorities straight.

So, it has been a busy start of the week and will be till my final exam next Friday. Then, it's going to be Easter! :) Espana here we come! Granada and Cordoba yipppee! Finally, the opportunity to see Our History (read: OH! the history of Islam) before my very eyes. OK, let's not go too much into the future.

Yikes! Please remind me to write a letter to PNB regarding my vacation to Spain! :)

On another note, I want to share this verse with all of you :

"Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while Allah has not yet made evident those of you who fight in His cause and made evident those who are steadfast?" Ali Imran [3:142]

It's just a reminder for me that Jannah is still far far away from my reach. Need to work my hardest! That's why we call it jihad. Which brings me to another point - we need to exploit all of our potentials for dakwah. Let it be singing, acting, video-making, blogging or whatever. Of course, never neglect usrah! :)

So, what are we waiting for? ^.^

Flight, fright and yeah right.

In the name of Allah.

Have I told you that I like to read things on sirah? Let me rephrase that; I LOVE sirah, despite History being my worst nightmare long long long time ago. You'll be surprised to see how you can relate the stories closely to your life.

When the muslims were sent out for an invasion or the likes of it, not all of them were granted the opportunity to join in the troop. Some had to stay back in Madinah. Now, I ask you - how did they feel looking at their comrades leaving for a battle?

I'm beginning to understand how they felt. Jealousy. Yes, in a good way. How they wished that they could join in, and deliver the risalah hand-in-hand with the others.

This is where my life comes in. A few of my friends are going out and about doing lots of things for dakwah. Silly old me is stuck here because I have lab sessions to attend to! I was so tempted to buy flight tickets during the ever so many and long incubation periods I had during the experiment. Pfft.

Thiiiiisss closeee!! >.<

So yeah, I was thiiiiiiss close to abscond from my lab. But there are obligations that I'm bound to. Just like the Companions who had to stay back. I'm pretty sure opportunities like this will come in time.

Let's make the best of this weekend! After all, every second in your life is dakwah! ;)

A third of the sweetness.

In the name of Allah.

On the authority of Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him), that the Prophet (may the blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There are three qualities whosoever has them, may taste the sweetness of Faith: firstly one who loves Allah and His Messenger (may the blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) above all else; secondly one who loves someone simply for the sake of Allah, and thirdly, one who loathes return to disbelief, after Allah has rescued him from it, as he would loath being thrown into the Fire.” [Bukhari and Muslim]

All I can say is, I'm still too far away from attaining halawatul iman. In fact, I'm not even sure if I'm on the path which brings me closer to it. But, I'm not going to let the uncertainties bring my spirit down.

For the past week, a lot had been learnt. Even the littlest of signs taught me a valuable message. The second criterion mentioned in the hadith somewhat summarises the whole thing.

So, what I'm going to do now, is to give my best to everyone despite the way they have/had/will treat(ed) me. That's the spirit! ;)

All that is sweet.

And sometimes, the simplest of words like, "Are you okay?" makes your heart smile. They may not be as great as the men around the Prophet s.a.w.. But they do make great companions in this righteous path.

Thank you Allah.

Staying positive.

In the name of Allah.

The Friday khutbah at Imperial College on Ka'ab bin Malik and his non-participation in the battle of Tabuk teaches me not to procrastinate especially in the work that relates to our Syahadatul Haq. Slowly, all of us will be able to not do things at the eleventh hour. Just don't give up. In case you're wondering what happened, you can just google it since I'm not good at writing narratives. :)

But then, there is something else that I just realised. There has been a series of tests in my life, just like what Ka'ab had experienced. In fact, it's happening again. To most of you, the statement I made might be vague. But to certain people who I regard them as my best friends, they would understand. It was not until recently that I revealed the stories to them.

Well, like I said, 'I regard them as best friends', but from my past experience I might just be treated like Ka'ab bin Malik. 'Might' being the operative word. For his story, there was a glad tiding in the end:

"And [He also forgave] the three who were left behind [and regretted their error] to the point that the earth closed in on them in spite of its vastness and their souls confined them and they were certain that there is no refuge from Allah except in Him. Then He turned to them so they could repent. Indeed, Allah is the Accepting of repentance, the Merciful." At-Taubah [9:118]

I hope that it will be the same to all of us inshAllah. I'm beginning to accept the fact that it's a kifarah for my sins. Alhamdulillah for Allah has given me the chance to repent.

"O' Allah, indeed we have believed, so forgive us our sins and protect us from the Fire." [3:16]

Let's all pray that He will always test us with great tribulations so that, we can be closer to him and of course, a step closer to Jannah each time. Amiin.